There was a tug at my heartstrings when I read the message (more of a reminder): "It is the person, not the gifts (that matters)" a.k.a you've been missed too. If only they knew that after so long, I still could not bring myself to walk through those doors. Rabbi inni maghlubun fantaswir ❤
It is true they say - some people have passed away but their character has kept them alive. Others are alive but their character has killed them. Allahu Allah! I can't help reflect on the story of Bilal which I recalled reading from the book gifted to me by another of my beloved teachers (From the Story of the Reed by Sufi scholar, Osman Nuri Topbas 2005 pp 120-121):
"When the Messenger of Allah passed away, it was as if Bilal had lost his voice, unable to speak. He could not stay in Medina any longer. Abu Bakr the Caliph pleaded with him to call the prayer once more, but Bilal's answer was: 'Ya Abu Bakr! Ask me what I wish, for I do not have the strength to call the prayer after the death of the Messenger of Allah. Do not force me. Please let me be...'
But Abu Bakr wanted to hear once more the beautiful athan which rung out in the days of old; he continued pleading with Bilal finally saying, 'After being deprived of their Messenger, should the nation be deprived of the Messenger's muezzin too?' Bilal finally gave in and went up the minaret, trying his utmost to hold back his tears, in order to make the call for the morning prayer. He could not contain himself, however, and began to weep. Bilal, unable to bring himself to make the call, in spite of all efforts, was pressed no further by Abu Bakr in this regard.
Bilal could not stay in Medina any longer and the same morning he immediately left for the city of Damascus. He participated in battles on the frontiers so that he would become a martyr and be with the Messenger of Allah; but as a matter of Divine predestination, he returned alive after each battle. Years passed in such a state.
One night, he saw the Messenger in his dream. The Messenger said to him, "Ya Bilal! What is this pain? Is it not time for you to visit me?' Bilal woke up in haste and immediately set off into the desert on his camel. After traveling for many days, he at last reached the radiant city of Medina. He ran straight to the grave of the Prophet before anyone could catch sight of him, and collapsed on the grave upon reaching it. As he put his head on the grave he started to cry and said, 'I have come, O Messenger, I have come!'
Just at that moment, the Prophet's grandsons Hasan and Hussayn came. Seeing them, Bilal rose and embraced them tightly saying, 'O the lights of the Prophet's eyes!' Hasan said, 'Bilal, I would like to ask you something, but will you do it for me?' Bilal responded, 'Tell me, my dear child, tell me!' Hasan said, 'We long to hear you make the athan as you once did for the Prophet at his masjid. We would like to hear it, will you make it?' 'I will make it for you,' replied Bilal.
At noon, Bilal went up to the place where he used to make the call to prayer in the masjid of the Prophet. He began to shout 'Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar!' in such a way that all of Medina shook associating this sound with the Messenger of Allah. The mountains and rocks wailed with this deep cry. When Bilal reached 'Ashhadu an la ilaha ilallah' the whole city trembled and with 'Ashhadu anna Muhammadan Rasulallah!' everyone poured out onto the streets. People were asking each other if the Messenger had returned to the world; people were crying, wailing...Bilal was trying not to choke on his tears in order to complete the call. But it was not possible... He could not contain himself..."
